Hi Kurlies!
As always, thank you for being you. Thank you for waking up. Thank you for putting one foot in front of the other. And thank you for gracing this world with your fabulous spririt! I appreciate you and I am so glad you're here.
This newsletter was inspired by a meditation I had in February. In it, I remembered my summer at Spelman College and a squirrel I used to walk past on my way to the train. I hope you enjoy this essay and that it gives you just what you need!
Dead Squirrels
A squirrel died on my walk to the metro. The poor little thing keeled over on the sidewalk right next to the grass. And for the rest of the summer, I watched it decompose under the hot Georgia sun - ashes to ashes, fur to dust.
Recently, I’ve been exploring patterns within myself that lead to giving my power away. Realizing these patterns were generational, and mostly imprinted in childhood (perhaps even epigenetically), made me feel worse. It felt like an impossible maze, that despite all of my attempts over the years, I would never get out of.
But acceptance is setting me free.
Acceptance means taking the dead squirrels hidden in the murky places inside of us and placing them under the hot rays of awareness. We don’t have to like the experience - I mean, who wants dead squirrels in their front yard? But giving them sunshine and letting them be is our chance at laying these behaviors to rest.
Here’s the key: when I walked past the dead squirrel on my way to the train, I didn’t stop and yell at it. I didn’t shame it for the audacity to die on the sidewalk. I didn’t guilt trip it.
As with the dead squirrel so with ourselves.
It doesn’t make sense to go back and yell at our own dead squirrels. First of all, they’re dead lol. Second of all, shame and guilt moves them back to the dank place and we need the sun of awareness to do its job. We need to let them decompose so they can fertilize our transformation into a richer state of being.
But what does it look like to accept?
I say, “I accept that...” and then I insert what I’d rather not admit, but deep down know is true. Then I make any corrections necessary and just let it be. I don’t shame it. I don't defend it. I don’t tell stories about it. I just let the observed pattern air out and go about my life.
Once I do that, something magical starts to happen. The unhealthy behavior slowly becomes healthier and healthier; and the false beliefs start to unravel all on their own, especially when I call in states of being I want to experience.
How to embody your Truth:
Recently, I was reminded that I AM already everything, I just have to call out what I want to experience from within. Then I was given this mantra that when coupled with acceptance makes for a powerful and healing practice. It goes, "I intend to experience the [insert state of being] that I AM." For example:
"I intend to experience the oneness that I AM. I intend to experience the unity that I AM. I intend to experience the fulfillment and worthiness that I AM. I intend to experience the enoughness that I AM. I intend to experience the beauty that I AM. I intend to experience the love that I AM."
Then I let it go. I don't try to make these intentions happen. I don't track my progress lol. I just repeat them because they feel good to say and then I let my subconscious do all the work.
Perhaps we all came here with dead squirrel assignments. When we accept they are there and marry them with intention, with time they’ll fertilize our lavish new beginnings. Here’s to allowing our dead squirrels to enrich our lives! Perhaps that’s why they’re here after all.
As always, thank you for everything you do on this Earth. Your existence is a blessing.
And I created an affirmation video that goes along with this newsletter! If you're interested, you can find it on our YouTube channel here. If you like it, give it a thumbs up and be sure to leave a comment!
Thank you and I love you!
Your Sister in Beauty,
✨ Lana ✨